Oh what a day!!!

Oh my, what a day!!! I know people say it...but I really did have one of those days today. Lily was restless all day (wanted to be cuddled non stop); I had my first trip to the dentist in many years. To top it off, I ended up with mastitis!!!

The Dentist Trip...

I psyched myself up for a dentist appointment (now I won’t reveal exactly home long it has been since my last visit to the dentist, but lets just say its been a long long time – to long in actual fact). The dentist is just one of those things that gets put on the back burner (way too expensive, no time, oh and just plain petrified). I’ll be honest, if I didn’t have this god awful pain in my tooth for more then a week on and off (that required the consumption of panadene forte) the trip to the dentist would have been postponed again no doubt.

Anyway, as I said, off I went to the dentist this afternoon for what I thought would be a filling. I waited in the waiting room for my turn...I could hear the drill going for some other patient, so as you can imagine the heart rate started to go up. I had said to Trevor earlier that day that I was really nervous about the whole filling thing – mainly about the needle and drill. He responded with, “what are you worrying for...you just gave birth a few weeks ago without drugs”. I suppose he has a point (but that doesn’t help a whole lot).

Ok, my turn rolls around and I hop on the dentist chair. I could smell that distinct ‘dentist smell’ – I’m sure you're all familiar. The dentist (who was a nice young chap) asked what the problem was. I explained my problem and he had a little squiz and that is where it started to get interesting. He said it was more serious then needing a filling. I had two options:

1. Removal of the tooth (costs around $120 – but of course that doesn’t include the replacement tooth which costs a lot more $$$$).
2. Root canal – 3 step process (costs around $630).

As you could imagine, I thought I was going to the dentist for a filling (around $150). I didn’t think I would have to come away spending a small fortune. Obviously, option 1 was not an option (durr...like I want to have a missing tooth!). So it looked like I had to go route 2. The first step of route 2 costs $250.

Naturally, I couldn’t leave my tooth the way it was as it was quite painful. After much toing and frowing (mainly due to the cost and the pain (or preserved pain)) that would be involved in the process) I decided to go for it. Essentially that meant a needle for the pain, some drilling and cleaning and that would be it until part 2.

“Breathe, breathe, breathe through your nose” – that is what the dentist kept repeating when he jabbed me with the needle. Thankfully the pain wasn’t all that bad. After another needle just to be on the safe side (because he thought we would be hitting a nerve) and a little wait (while the anaesthetic took hold) he was drilling away. The feeling was a little surreal – my lip felt like it was about five times the size it should be; my chin was all tingling and I only had half a tongue (or at least that is how it felt).

After a bit of drilling, which is so not the most pleasant feeling (needle or no needle) – it’s the noise I reckon – he stopped and told me I need you to “make an important decision”. Ahh Ohh - I was thinking my tooth had to come out or something. Thankfully not that serious...As he had not hit the nerve (which he expected would be the case) he decided that a good old fashioned filling was possible (thank God – only $130!!!). However, he did say that a root canal might still be required – hey at $610 I would take the chance and have the filing, and that I did. Overall the experience wasn’t that bad – I will go back – maybe a little bit sooner this time.

Mastitis

Not long after I returned from the dentist, I started to feel extremely cold – like freezing cold. So cold in fact, that after I finished feeding Lily, I went and had a hot bath (strange when it was like 26C out side). The bath didn’t do all that much to warm me up...I still froze. Trevor went and picked up Byron. By the time he got back my temperature was 39C. I was in bed, shivering and aching all over.

During the course of the afternoon, I had noticed an ache in my right breast that had progressively gotten worse. There were no lumps or anything that I could feel. The breast wasn’t red or hot, but it was extremely tender. The pain was a similar pain that I had had a few weeks previously (I had thought my bra had dug in causing some bruising). That pain however had disappeared after a few days.

Mum ended up coming around to take me to the doctors. Meanwhile, Trevor was not a happy camper (and let all know it) because he had a work break up that he could no longer go to (obviously!). By the time I had gotten to the doctors, my temperature was 39.8C and climbing. As expected, he diagnosed me with mastitis and prescribed antibiotics, bed rest and Panadol for the fever. If there were any lumps that decided to stay put, I was to go straight back to see him on Monday.

I suppose it goes without saying that it sure was a rough day.

Edited to add (on Sunday 1 October 2006)...

I am not sure whether it was the antibiotics or 8 hours sleep (in a row) or both, but I felt much better on Saturday, albeit very drained, still sore, but no fever. I am grateful for the nights sleep...Trevor took Lily for the night and did all the feeds which helped immensely (might schedule that as a regular event!). I can’t tell you how good it was to get more then 4 hours sleep after a month of hardly any.

Whilst reading about Mastitis I came to the conclusion that because Lily hasn’t been attaching properly on the right side (the affected side) for the last few weeks she hasn’t been draining it properly which has resulted in a blocked duck. As a further consequence of her poor attachment, my milk supply has dropped to half of what it was (which is really worrying). I am expressing after each feed just to make sure I am getting the most out of it...hopefully that will work.

It seems I am a little rundown, which has spawned this massive cold sore on my lip. I have suffered from them in the past but mainly when I am sick and rundown. It looks awful.

On a positive note...at least my tooth is doing well!

My baby boy is 3!!!

Oh my gosh, Byron is 3 today. Where does the time go?

Happy Birthday my Pumpkin Pie!

27 September, 2006

To My Dearest Byron,

Today you turn three. You are far from a baby, no longer a toddler but a little boy…my little boy; my pumpkin pie. It literally seems like yesterday you were born; yesterday you first smiled; yesterday you learned to walk; and yesterday you learned to talk (and never shut up!). In reality though, the ‘years’ have passed since those events. It is so hard to believe how fast you are growing up. With each passing day, you grow more; learn more and we discover what it is to be Byron.

At three Byron, you are funny (oh so funny!); you have this ability to articulate your thoughts and concerns well beyond your years and have done so for quite a while. There are so many occasions when I have been taken aback but something you have said…and I sit there with a smile on my face…laughing on the inside (I don’t want you to think that I am not taking what you have to say seriously). With this however comes some trouble – you are cheeky beyond belief, sometimes causing your father and I grief with your incessant babble (and it can be relentless) and constant need to talk.

You are sensitive to people’s feelings, especially if they appear upset…and it causes you great concern if something you have done might have upset someone else.

You are just adorably beautiful (I don’t think I’m biased!). I found myself the other day just looking at you…staring deep within your piercing blue eyes (and piercing they are – just like your Grandad’s eyes) wondering what they hide within. When someone said “your eyes are the windows to your soul” they were not lying, because for you…they are your essence and core, revealing so much of your character. You have this ability to communicate with your eyes…cheekily looking sideways when you want something; squinting when you are hysterically laughing; or just simply that wide eyed look of wonderment when you discover something new. It truly is wonderful!

You are the best big brother. It has only been a month, but in that time you have shown what the future holds for your relationship with Lily. I have no doubt, you will be loving, protective and a friend to your sister. I can’t wait to see that relationship grow and develop as the months, years and decades go by.

I am eternally grateful that at 7.40am on 27 September 2003 you entered my world, a world that truly couldn’t have been complete without you. There aren’t enough words to express how much I love you, but as you know, “I love you all the way to the moon and back!”.

I look forward to sharing many many more birthdays with you in the years and decades to follow.

Love always and forever
Your Mummy xxxx

Felt Pens and Nipple Vasospasm....

Byron is generally pretty good with his pencils; crayons and felt tip pens (although all but one of these is out of reach - basically, we just couldn’t trust a 2 year old to draw responsibly with felt tip pens whilst we were not around – at least crayons and pencils don’t mark surfaces too easily. A 2 year old psyche just can’t resist the urge to use those lovely bright pens.). He has never drawn on any walls or books; occasionally he might draw on the table (accidentally – or maybe not so) but generally he draws on the page he is supposed to. However, the last few days he has taken to drawing on himself.

As I might have mentioned, all but one (a nice royal blue felt tip pen) are out of his reach – don’t ask me why this one wasn’t put with the rest of them. This morning, whilst Trevor was getting ready for work and I was in bed feeding Lily, Byron decided to take it upon himself to draw, or should I say colour in his hands (especially his palms), arms and legs with the royal blue pen.

It’s funny because Trevor and I didn’t initially notice it...in fact it was probably half an hour or so before we did (I reckon our eyes must have been painted on). When Trevor did notice it, he didn’t get mad...he just told him to go and see his mother (you know...I won’t discipline but I will get your mother too). At first, Byron wouldn’t come near me, or show me any appendages for that matter. I asked what he had done and then he showed me his arms and hands, which were hiding behind his back. I didn’t get angry (in fact I was trying desperately not to laugh); I just said there would be no more ‘big boy pens’ for him if he couldn’t draw properly. He promptly burst into tears (full on tears) saying "I’m not mummy’s friend anymore!!!" over and over again. Meanwhile he was getting the royal treatment from his father (LOL "daddy’s my friend, mummy's not my friend").

Needless to say, it was bath time for Byron...



I couldn’t go past mentioning that Lily is 4 weeks old today – nearly a month!!! She is filling out well. She seems to be awake much more then she was a week ago, although her wake time wouldn’t consist of more then 3 to 4 hours. During that period however, she seems to be more alert and responsive to what you are saying - no smiles yet!!

She is still feeding every 3 hours (sometimes less) day and night (although sometimes I manage to get 4 hours at night, but not every night) . We are still struggling a little with the breast feeding, especially on the right side. Little Miss Lazy won’t open up her mouth very wide...I have to kinda pry her bottom jaw open with my finger.

I have noticed that on the right side I am suffering from 'Nipple Vasospasm' (Vasospasm occurs when blood vessels constrict (or tighten)). Apparently if you are suffering from this you may:

• feel an intense nipple pain, which some women describe as a burning and throbbing pain (yep I get this)
• notice the nipple or the tip of the nipple blanches or turns white (...and this; thankfully it turns back to its normal colour and doesn't remain white!)
• You may notice the signs and symptoms for a few seconds, minutes or even longer (...it usually lasts for 30 seconds at a time and with a few episodes after feeding)

Apparently one of the triggers for Vasospasm is poor attachment. The most common reason for nipple blanching is that the baby is compressing the nipple while nursing. This is obviously the cause in my situation seeing as Little Miss Lazy refuses to open up her mouth nice and wide which is therefore creating attachment dramas yet again. Dr Google says that applying some heat to the nipple (using a hair dryer or heat pack) after feeding will reduce the pain – Man I can’t wait till all these breast feeding dramas are over. Dr Google (what would we do without him?) also says that if the baby is putting on weight and the pain is manageable then it isn’t a major problem. I must admit that I prefer this vasospasm over cracked and bleeding nipples anytime!

Happy Anniversary!

Today marks Trevor and my 4th wedding anniversary.

Happy Anniversary!!!

Will be back tomorrow to finish this entry (seems to be a running theme of late) - need to get to bed and get a few hours sleep before Lily wakes up!

20 Questions

It has officially begun – that point in a child’s life when they want answers to everything. It all started the other day when we (Bryon and I) were driving along in the car. Byron enquired as to the reason we have trees. I responded without delay by saying "they help us breath by filtering the oxygen" (like a not yet 3 year old could process that answer). He seemed happy with the answer, promptly moving on to his next question "why are there clouds", followed with "what is high up in the sky" ie. What can ‘fly’?

Those questions are fine...easy to answer. It’s those ‘hard to answer’ questions that I am dreading the most. Today, I was on the end of one of those questions. In the bath tonight, Byron asked me "who maked me?". It took me a minute to process the question (was he asking who made him) during which time I said nothing. He then promptly asked the question again "who maked me?". There was no mistaking that he wanted to know in somewhat uncertain terms, where he came from. I responded with "I made you...in my tummy like I made Lily". He seemed ok with that answer although I imagine that as he gets older my around about answers won’t suffice (...I wonder if there are any books out in the market place that provide creative answers to those awkward questions...).

3 weeks already...

Mental Note...write diary during the day because one does not get the chance at night any longer!.

It seems the period between 6.00pm and 9.30pm is the "witching hour" or hours. It’s a time when Lily just wants to be cuddled. If you (meaning me) cuddle her she is fine – no crying. If you don’t, she cries or grizzles. This makes bathing Byron, getting dinner, eating dinner and internet time (mainly EB or MSN) extremely hard.

It is 10.50pm and Lily has just gone to bed...so I need to go to bed seeing as I will be up again in a few hours. So again, I will just "make a space" and come back with my diary entry for week 3 tomorrow (it seems I have a few entries to catch up on).

Til tomorrow...

*********************************************************

Ok I am back, managing to squeeze a few minutes into my diary writing whilst little Miss is asleep in her swing (although for how long I don’t know).

It is hard to believe that Lily is 3 weeks old already; time is just flying by. Over the last week I have noticed that she...

• Still sleeps a whole lot more then she is awake. If truth be told, her wake time would only consist of approximately 3 hours maximum (collective). During that time, she just looks around and moves her little arms freely. Sometimes she gets crossed eyed, which I remember Byron used to do often.

• Continues to look like a newborn baby. When I’m out and about I still get those stares and whispers of "awwwhhh look at that tiny baby...how sweet". I measured her length and it’s around 52.5cms. Her head is around 37cms now (thank god I didn’t have to push that extra centimetre out). She is currently wearing 0000's and some 00000's (I am making sure she at least gets a few wears out of all her clothes - I suspect though this might prove a little difficult)

• Squirms, wriggles and stretches all day long, all of which is accompanied by these peculiar grunting noises and sighs.

• Likes to be cuddled a lot more then she did a week ago. She particularly loves to cuddle up like a Koala, pulling her legs right up high and her arms tucked into her side (Oh I might just have a cuddly one this time around!).

• Is feeding much better then she was last week. Although, feeding on the right side is still a work in progress. At least I can say we are nearly on the home stretch in terms of my ‘left’ nipple (ie. there are no cracks or bleeding in sight – but that could change)!

• Is a little piggy who would feed every 2 hours if she could! At the moment I try to stretch her out as much as I can and usually feed every 3 – 4 hours (although there is no routine to it). Sometimes there is just no stretching and Little Miss Piggy gets her way after 2 hours! At night, after I feed her at around 10.00pm she generally wakes between 1.30 – 2.30am and then again at around 4.30 – 5.30am. She is putting on weight nicely (at her last weigh in she was 3610grams) and starting to get chubby little cheeks and a double chin. She also has this fat, round little belly. Trevor likes to refer to her as the "Ethiopian baby".

She just loves to eat…

The Wedding

Stay tuned...I am just leaving a space for the wedding story (just don't have the energy right at this moment - will be back tomorrow hopefully). Let’s just say, it was a lovely day (apart from the pouring rain!!!).

Byronism of the Day...

The bridal party had just arrived at the venue (via water taxi) and we met Byron, who was a page boy, there. We were talking about how we looked (the bridesmaids) when Byron turned and said to me "your not beautiful mummy, your a princess". Let’s just say, there were a lot of awwwwhhhhsss, none louder of course then mine. I knew he was born for a reason – to boost my ego!

My Speech....

Tomorrow is my besty's wedding...the one I thought I might ruin by either not showing up - ie having my baby, or not fitting the bridesmaid dress because I was too pregnant. I can't tell you how much of a relief it is to know that 1) I will be attending the wedding in my capacity as maid of honour and 2) the dress fits. All I need worry about now is giving my speech and making sure my boobs don't leak everywhere!

Here is my speech...

Today I am speaking on behalf of all the bridesmaids. For those of you who don't know me, my name is Nicole. I have had the great pleasure of knowing T for the last 12 years. For most of those 12 years I have considered her my very best friend and I’d like to think she considered me hers.

We would like to start off by saying Congratulations to T and J. We would also like to thank you both for asking us to be part of your special day (not that you really had much of a choice). It meant so much to me, and no doubt the other bridesmaids, to watch my best friend, marry the man of her dreams this afternoon.

We would also like everyone to join us in commending the best man and the groomsmen for their stellar performance today. You did an amazing job and we know the Bride & Groom truly appreciate all your support.

There are many people giving speeches today so we are going to keep it short. This is by no means a reflection on our feelings for T or J. On the contrary, there are so many things I (and all the bridesmaids) want to say and we know that there are not enough pages to fill or time to speak. So, we are going to break tradition a little bit and not say a speech about T and J but rather a poem to you both.

Wonderful Wedding Wishes

A girl dreams about her wedding
-that blissfully special day.
So much excitement and anxiety
Over what to do and say.

You've found your perfect man
Who loves and cherishes you.
Your loving vows unite your souls,
Creating one heart shared by two.

Marriage is a promise to compromise
No matter how great or small.
Though life is never perfect,
True love surpasses all.

Give freely and unconditionally.
Enjoy a life filled with mutual caring.
We wish you a wonderful marriage
With sweet joys that make life endearing.

As you enter this wonderful new time in your life,
When you make J lucky by becoming his wife,
We wish you all the happiness that the world can provide,
May good luck and fortune be always at your side.

May your marriage be happy, healthy and blessed,
Today and forever, we wish you nothing but the best.

To conclude, I came across a quote that I would like to share with you. I particularly like this quote, T, as it applies to you and J as a couple but it also equally applies to you and I as friends.

"As you sit side by side through this roller coaster of life remember to scream from the peaks, hold hands through the dips, laugh through the loop-the-loops and enjoy every twist and turn for the ride is better because you share it together."

Night Sweats - Gross!

The first night I spent in hospital (the night I got induced) I woke up about 4 times sweating quite badly (especially around my neck, back, tummy, legs – hey everywhere). I thought it was those annoying plastic sheets on the hospital beds (you know the ones that protect the mattress from blood and the like) that was causing me to sweat profusely whilst sleeping. The following nights I spent in hospital (after delivery) were the same. Every time I woke up to feed (or because someone else’s baby was screaming) I felt disgustingly hot and not to mention, sweaty. I continued to think it was those darn hospital sheets, so I removed the plastic sheet thingy from the bed (yep took it off) thinking this would solve the problem. It didn’t – I still woke up sweating.

It goes without saying that I couldn’t wait to get home to my own bed, with my own sheets because OBVIOUSLY it was the hospital etc that was causing me to be so hot. Wrong...the sweating continued when I got home and has persisted every night since Lily was born. It wasn’t until I was reading a book about breastfeeding (research on my other problem area) that I came across a mention of night sweats. That’s when it clicked...I was suffering (or am suffering) from night sweats.

I had never heard or been told that you could suffer from night sweats after having a baby. I knew that it was normal to feel like you had a bun in the oven when pregnant, but not once the baby was cooked and out. Dr Google doesn’t really have a whole lot to offer on the subject. It does however shed a little bit of light on the issue (enough at least to know its normal and that I am not alone or suffering early menopause).

For those who don’t know...

What it is: Postpartum Sweating aka Night Sweats - The tendency to sweat like you’ve just run a marathon, even though you may be sitting still, or sleeping.

What causes it: Your hormones again, as they instruct your body to rid itself of all those extra fluids it was formerly using to nourish your baby. However, even after the water weight is gone, you may continue to sweat more than usual if you're nursing; theories suggest it is related to hormonal and metabolic changes associated with breastfeeding. Apparently, the emotional stress of new motherhood might cause you to sweat more, too, and though no one knows for sure, it's possible that the dramatic drop in estrogen that occurs right after delivery also contributes. Gee its nice to know there isn’t a definitive cause.

How long will it last: Postpartum sweating can last several weeks after birth, though it tends to last longer for breastfeeding women.

WOW...now that I know what it is, there is no ‘cure’ or treatment available and it will last for a little while longer, I guess I can rest easy – well try to anyway. Might try putting a towel on the bed; maybe the ceiling fan on; sleeping in the nud or just grinning and bearing it!!!

Two weeks!

For the record today marked my due date - week 40 of my pregnancy. I am a proud advocate that 38 weeks of pregnancy is enough.

3.36pm today marked the two week anniversary since Lily’s arrival and what a blur those two weeks have been. It honestly feels like yesterday that I gave birth – not physically so, but emotionally, mentally and spiritually. To think that it has been 2 weeks since I was pregnant...2 weeks since I pushed that 36cms head out (with no drugs!)...2 weeks since Byron became a big brother (and I became the mother of two) and 2 weeks (well not quite) since I bought her home, is inconceivable (well to me anyway).

I guess this is due to the fact that so much has happened in these past two weeks that I really haven’t had the chance to just sit back, exhale and take heed of what I have been through since the birth. There have been many hospital visits, numerous visitors (although no where near as many as there was with Byron), a great deal of frustration (due to breastfeeding) and of course much love (what’s not to love about my little Lily).

Trevor went back to work today (actually it was Friday but Byron was at kindy so technically I only had Lily) so today was the first time I was ‘alone’ with 2 kids! This was a little scary seeing as we had a doctor’s visit and I wanted to go to the clinic. This meant obviously that I couldn’t just stay home, and stay safe so to speak. I actually had to pack the kids in the car (by myself) and venture out. To make matters worse, today was a freezing, wet, dismal day in Brisbane (most certainly out of the ordinary). So not only did I have to venture out for the first time with 2 kids, I had to do it in the rain!

First on the agenda was a visit to the doctors to check on Lily. Typical Byron style – he mucks around whilst having the consultation with the doctor (I think it had something to do with the jelly bean factor) and I had Lily so I found it difficult to ‘chastise’ (mental note – must learn to adapt). On a separate note, the doctor was happy with Lily’s eye and said all was healing well. Plus her colour was good. All in all, she was extremely happy with Lily’s progress.

Following the doctor’s visit we headed off to the early childhood clinic to have Lily weighed and to discuss further, with the lactation consultant, my breastfeeding issues. There weren’t to many dramas at this visit – I guess they are used to little kids and offered to put on a video for Byron while I was ‘tutored’ on the breastfeeding front.

Speaking of breastfeeding; it seems that I am taking one step forward and two steps backwards (I feel like I am getting no where). As it stands today, my left nipple is grazed and my right nipple is cracked (and on occasion bled a few times) . To say I have felt frustrated now and then over the past two weeks is an understatement. Frustration, disillusionment, disappointment, sadness have made there way to my neck of the woods – Why can’t I get it? Why can’t Lily get it? Why is this happening this time and not with Byron? What am I doing wrong? I know ‘we’ will eventually get it which is great and why I am persevering. It just seems like a long (and painful) road at the moment, which I guess is completely understandable.

Whilst I type this entry, my little Lily sits here on my lap, wide awake looking around. She doesn’t have a lot of wake time during a 24 hour period. Her wake time consists of around 1 – 1½ hours per day. With Byron I couldn’t wait til he reached the ‘next stage’ whether that be smiling, rolling over, crawling, walking etc. With Lily however, I am just making the most of this tiny little bundle (who wears 00000’s – 0000’s are to big!) sitting happily on my lap because I am so conscious of the fact they grow up so quickly.

No more hospital visits!

I am pleased to advise that the days of hospital visits are behind us...at least for the next 5 weeks anyway.

On Tuesday (5th September) we visited the hospital for the 4th time since we were discharged from hospital. This time it was for another ophthalmologist appointment and the ultrasound of Lily’s kidney.

The ophthalmologist was very happy with her eye indicating he didn’t think there would be any permanent damage – which was music to my ears. All we have to do now is continue with the drops 4 times a day for the next week. If she does get a similar infection in the not to distant future we are to bring her back.

The ultrasound went well. Although, Lily didn’t particularly like it – it seems she just hates being ‘exposed to the elements’.

Today, we had the follow up visit at the hospital (visit #5) to find out more about her dilation problem and the results of the ultrasound. The ultrasound revealed:

• The kidneys are normal in contour and texture for age.
• There is dilation of the pelvis on the left side (0.83cms)
• The left ureter is visible in the pelvis and appears to peristalses actively and collapse on screening.
• The right upper collecting system is also prominent with less marked dilation then the left (0.58cms)
• The right ureter appears normal.
• The bladder appears normal.

What does this all mean???? In short, the paediatrician noted it was good news. Particularly, she was really happy the dilation had reduced by half of what it was in utero (which was apparently more serious then we were led to believe). She noted that, if there was to be a problem, it appears it rests with the left side. At this stage, it looks like the valves connecting the bladder and the ureters are under developed. It is often the case that children will grow out of this at a later stage.

For now, the course of action will be to continue with the antibiotics (which will reduce the chances of urinary track infections). When Lily is 6 weeks old we will have to go back to the hospital for a MCU (Micturating Cysto-Urethrogram) – English: x-ray taken of the bladder and urethra whilst the patient urinates; uses dye. This test should enable the doctors to see exactly what the problem might be. We will then have a follow up appointment to discuss the results and what future action, if any, is required.

For now, it is just a matter of watching her closely to see that she doesn’t develop any urinary track infections.

I for one am extremely relieved that she is doing ok. Lets face it, things could have been a while lot worse with the eye infection and the dilation problem. If anything, visiting the children’s hospital this last week has made me appreciate the fact that I have 2 healthy happy children with no long lasting health problems. For that I am so very thankful.

Moving on...I might have mentioned this already...but gee my boobies are sore.

I visited the lactation consultant yesterday in the hope that maybe she could wave her magic wand and things would be peachy – wishful thinking on my part.

After flashing my boobs to a total stranger (the loss of dignity continues well after child birth) I was advised:

• My bra was well fitting (good to know)
• There didn’t appear to be any infections in the nipple (to my shock horror she noted Golden Staff loves a warm moist nipple!!!)
• I have good milk supply .

Examination of Lily’s mouth revealed good tongue control with no apparent jaw problems which would impede breast feeding.

During the consultation I feed Lily (on the left side for the first time in 2 days without the use of a nipple shield). For what it is worth, the feed didn’t go to bad (by that I mean, the pain wasn’t toe curling and there was no bleeding involved). It appears Lily attaches correctly then moves her lower jaw upwards closer to the nipple, which is causing all the pain and grazing of the nipples. I was advised to take her off each time she does this and then reattach her in the hope that we can 'retrain her' (so much for half hour feeds!).

I left the consultation feeling a whole lot more confident in my ability to breastfeed her. However, this completely disappeared when it came time to feed on the right side. For some reason, my right side seems to be more of a problem then the left. After an hour, I managed to feed her, however I was completely (as I imagine she was) unsatisfied with how things went. Things just went from bad to worse during the course of the day and night. I can tell you...starting a feed at 2.30am and finishing at 4.00am ain’t my cup of tea.

After much frustration on my part and Lily’s, tears and tantrums, I decided it was time to call the consultant again for a little bit of guidance (at that point I think I really needed some reassurance that it would be ok). In short she said breastfeeding is a ‘holistic’ exercise and frustration on both our parts isn’t helping at all. She noted feeds shouldn’t take any longer the one hour from start to finish. So in our case, she suggested that we try for half an hour (or until things get to frustrating) and if things fail that I should express and feed the remaining feed to her in a bottle. Alternatively, she suggested I stick with the nipple shields (at lest on the right breast) until things settle down.

I have taken her advice on board. Here's hoping my boobies get a reprieve shortly.

Oh my boobies hurt!

Well the week since I gave birth has flown by. I can’t believe Lily is a week old already. To tell you the truth, I am kind of sad. As silly as that sounds, I am. I am sad the anticipation of waiting to meet my little one has gone. The flurry of excitement when they arrive has gone. My pregnant belly (with baby in it – not the flab) has gone (sounds strange I know). It goes without saying however that the sadness is replaced with joy, happiness, exhilaration and love for my little Lily.

Considering all the little health hiccups we have had along the way, Lily is such a little cherub. She hardly cries at all and just sleeps. She has a few moments during the day when she might open her eyes. Those moments are few but a highlight of my day. She stares up at your face, making little movements with her hands and mouth. Just beautiful! Her eyes light up when Bryon gives her kisses or when he talks to her. She seems to know him so well.

There is really only one major drama at the moment and that is centred on breastfeeding. At hospital she was such a good little feeder – attachment was perfect and there really wasn’t a lot of pain. As I may have mentioned, I have been suffering from a viral infection which it seems I might have passed on to Lily – well at least the nasal congestion part anyway. The poor little dear is all choked up and having lots of trouble breathing through her nose, especially at night (which is how newborn babies breathe).

This in turn is causing major problems on the feeding front. It seems that her inability to breathe properly through her nose has led to incorrect attachment (which for breastfeeding is tragic!). My poor poor boobies are suffering beyond belief. So much so, that last night I resorted to nipple shields (which were ok) and today I had to resort to expressing and feeding her through a bottle. This whole situation is so new to me because I had absolutely no dramas feeding Byron. I didn’t even know what a cracked nipple was let alone what it felt like – let me tell you…it ain’t nice! Try getting some sand paper, rubbing it against your nipple causing some crazing and bleeding along the way. Add some sucking motion and voila you have pain!!!

I took her to the doctors today and she expects her little snuffly nose should be gone in a few days. Until that time, she ain’t going anywhere near my nipple without a nipple shield, that’s for sure. I have an appointment with a lactation consultant on Wednesday and I am hoping she can give me some tips for feeding snuffly nosed babies. Until then its a matter of grinning and bearing it.

Whilst at the doctors, Lily had her neonatal examination (day 5-10). For the record, at day 7, Lily had regained most of her birth weight, weighing in at 3.3kgs (which according to the doctor is excellent given her health problems). Her head still measured 36cms. Her height strangely enough measured 50cms (and that was a stretch) which means the midwife made a mistake with her height measurement at birth (I knew she was smaller then Byron!!).

I wonder what week 2 will harbour????

Rough few days...

Well it has been a rough few days to say the least.

In short Lily contracted Golden Staf in her left eye which has required multiple visits to the hospital and doctors; Lily was jaundiced; Byron has lost his listening ears again and is being cheeky; I have a viral chest infection and to top it off, I have aggravated (quite severely) my SPD. I will fill in the finer details later as, you could probably appreciate, it has been a rough few days and I just don't have the energy.

For now here are a few pics of my little princess...

Byronism of the day...

I was telling Byron that I needed to go and change Lily’s nappy. He asked why and I said because it is dirty. He responded with, "make sure you take the poo out of her belly button!". No matter how many times we tell him, he seems to think that Lily’s umbilical cord is "poo".